Kiss Army to withdraw 1500 troops from Iraq

The Kiss Army has announced that it will slowly withdraw as many as 1500 troops from Iraq over the next six months. The troops, which has been rockin' out in the Basrah region to the south, has run into increasing problems related to face paint in such extreme temperatures. "We can't fight if our makeup is running into our eyes", said Army spokesman Ricky Carr. "And it's nearly impossible to navigate effectively in that sand while wearing our Kiss Army boots."

The Kiss Army has been credited with little other than rowdiness during it's three years in the region. "They mostly just hang out in their makeup and drink beer in parking lots", said a U.S. military spokesman. "They spend an inordinate amount of time getting ready, but for what I don't know."

The Kiss Army, which has countless thousands of members worldwide, originally entered the region in 2005 after an internet rumor suggested that guitar player/vocalist Paul Stanley had been captured by insurgents.