Thursday, April 30, 2009

Obama offers heartfelt apology to Pig Americans


Obama extended an olive branch to what he called a "nation of grieving, downtrodden Pig Americans", calling the swine flu an unfair mischaracterization of what "pigs are all about" during his 100th day address to the media. He implored people to refer to pig's as "Pig Americans", not just pigs, because "they share in our grief and suffering." Obama offered a reminder that the swine flu would have been "handled and dealt with by those in the pig world if not for our unfortunate meddling in their business," adding, "Remember, people pet pigs. Pigs don't pet people."
He suggested that the government would do all it could to remediate the much maligned pig population through, ironically, a bill that he vowed will be "stuffed with and for pork".
Obama also suggested that Pig Americans will be included in his sweeping health care reform agenda, maintaining the position that "no American should go without healthcare--and that includes Pig Americans".

1 comment:

Sparkle Plenty said...

Say it ain't so, Ro(n)! No new posts?

Oh, lordy. You got swined!